To growing up…..

To growing up…..

10, 12, 13, … 16, 19….

The milestones in growing up are such numbers, though seemingly harmless, leave you in a plethora of changes, some of which are starkly intense. When we reach our much talked about “teens”, you get to hear of, read about and advised on the changes that we are going to encounter.       

But there is no guidebook to skipping out of nineTEEN.

             Suddenly, probably not so sudden for all of us, we are not expected to make careless mistakes. The words you once uttered, which were excused, considering them as teenage malfunctioning of your brain, are now supposed to be literally meant. You can’t have a casual conversation or you are a loose talker and not a “chill guy” anymore. You can’t blame your short tempered upsurge on a mood swing because you are technically not allowed to have one. You ARE supposed to be calm, composed, mature.

   The situational irony of “behave yourself, you’ve grown up now” at once and “do you think you are already too old” now falls off and you ARE assumed to be responsible and careful.

      I believe growing up is more often an internal expedition than not, much more than what meets the eye. The flickering ideas, wandering thoughts, thumping heart, obsessive dreams, gleaming eyes all evaporate, all subservient to the new master, the mind. We are at the helm of a new world.

The one, wherein, we are hurt by people, but we no longer want to hurt them back. The one, wherein, you know that nobody stands by your side for real. Your “har friend zaruri hota hai” gets a “conditions applied” asterisk claiming “only in the happy times” because when both of you are stuck in a rut together, he/she simply doesn’t mind trampling over you, indifferent to consequences you would have to face. These are practical demonstrations of our parents’ words that seemed to be cacophonic lectures. Not anymore.

When we are able to tell ourselves to breathe in rage, we grow up. When we can rise above hatred, envy, inferiority and evil, I grow up. When we can hide our tears, even when in desire to shatter and weep, we grow up. When we no longer believe in innocence and truth in people around us, we grow up. When we can bear with the fact and take it in our stride that the world is not a just courtroom, you grow up.

           

             Sometimes we ARE supposed to be polite to a person, you know, who has talked crap about you and you want to punch him in the face, you can’t, you’ve grown up. We must bear and not complain, fight and not lose, forgive and not avenge.

This new world is an epiphany for most of us, me at least. A world where being straightforward implies you are going to be kicked, where it hurts the most, soon and again and yet again.

Fake is the new trend, diplomacy the new weapon and flattery the only virtue.

I might seem to be a pessimist to most of you, but you don’t really need to boast about the pros of growing up. Isn’t it more important to deal with the cons? Growing up is not as glittery gold as it seems, but it is something I loved being introduced to.

The hurt people give doesn’t ache that much anymore, a setback isn’t that discouraging and I surely am ambitious, calm. Focused and determined like never before.

                                      Cheers to growing up!! :)

Attachments- this really makes sense now. Ticked off almost all  on the list, determined for the rest-

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream—and not make dreams your master;
If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same:
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss:
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much:
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!

When you have parted ways….

When you have parted ways….

“I am counting my days, when’d I leave college”

I heard her say this, took a second to absorb that and then, something changed inside me.

On one hand are the final years who are all perplexed at the idea that they have to part ways soon, distance themselves from people who matter to them and move to the real battlefield called Life; on the other, are we, the others. Frustrated because of petty issues, subtle politics (doesn’t seem so subtle when you are at the receiving end of it though), internal conflicts, waves of rage, envy, inferiority complex or any other ingredient that you can think of which has a potency of making your life distasteful. 

This frustration has often overpowered the surreal fantasies that we carved out in our mind about college and college life. But the bigger question is, what is more important?

Trivial differences and conflicts or the loss that we’d bear by missing out on bonding with equally talented people around us?

2 years down the line, when each one of us would walk out of the gate we walked into in August 2012, look BACK at the MIG that we looked FORWARD to and stared in absolute surprise, bid adieu to the stone engraved with VNIT that we clicked photos with, what do we want to look back to?

A time where we could have made our expectations alive but we didn’t because we were struck with ego or extreme sensitivity or just the thought that he dint ask me why should I? A time where we had so much of unhealthy competition amongst ourselves that we began to think of each other as machines rather than working together to build one? A time when we sat looking forward to an opportunity to degrade the other?

OR, better…                                                                                                                 

A time when a Nescafe with friends in the VNIT rains breathed life into the sessional-end semester race, a time when we fanatically screamed in the auditorium and made IG one of the most unforgettable moments in life, a time when a healthy discussion on prospects after graduation made you feel intelligent?

It’s a choice that we make today.

Make the one you won’t regret when you part ways with people.

Agreed, every instance   doesn’t head the way you want, every person doesn’t react the way you expected, neither can they, nor should they. But we must make a choice. Is the difference more important than the person, his one comment more important than his friendship?

We need to rise above pettiness. Look at the bigger picture. Because, not after a very long time, we’d part ways. Probably never to meet some people in life. EVER. Not even those who you’d feel could have been your best buddies.

What do we do? Call/text/meet him. Sort out, throw up stuff, hit him, give him a hug and stay happy together.

If regret is not one thing you want to walk out of college with, just 2 simple tasks weave the magic- Apologize and Forgive. No difference, no hatred, is bigger than losing a person irrespective of how he is.

To some, this might seem one of the other crappy emotional piece, to some it might create the change it created in me. Irrespective of it. Ending the all too emotional and straight from the heart piece, I’d like to apologize to anybody who has ever, knowingly or unknowingly, felt otherwise about anything relating to me.

I am sorry, because life for me is too short to cultivate differences and too short to love enough.
 "When you find somebody you want to keep around for a long time, you must do something about it".

Love

Palak J

First Year in VNIT

“Whatever you get in VNIT, just take it” is what every person who has scored a rank exceeding 10 thousand in AIEEE hears. Same was my case. I wouldn’t throw a blatant lie proclaiming “I wanted metallurgical branch, it was of my interest” and so on. The reason for this does not lie in some fault in the department/course. It lies in the mass-‘UN’awareness that exists amongst people.

Like most people, I was admitted to Metallurgical and Materials Engineering department in the spot round, and frankly speaking I had my inhibitions about the department. Believe it or not, accept it or not, the importance of a branch is weighed against the closing ranks of admission to that department, which disillusions most, not excluding me.

Well, starting from the first day in college. Being admitted in the spot round meant I was to be in the L section and what I faced the first week was mere indifference. People seemed to be absorbed in themselves and unresponsive to calls of help and it instantly made me loathe attending college. What changed in the next week was like a roller coaster ride aiming to touch its zenith.

As the auditions of freshers was announced , which also reached my ears on the last minute because of being a day scholar or “dayski” as we are called, life in VNIT took a huge U turn. From quite an eventful audition where I was introduced to the “sir-mam” order of college to being selected in compering and dance events, there was never a looking back. Compering, as promised by Srijana mam, gave me friends who were to stay by my side all through college. Spending endless hours writing scripts that could amuse the audience, practicing with thumbs stuck to our nose to rehearse how to use the “not so Bose level” mikes, compering helped me grow from a school girl to a mature college person, apart from awarding me with the most caring seniors in college and my first Tech- Family.

After freshers next eventful occasion was the Department Gathering. Being anxious yet excited about meeting seniors, all of us thoroughly enjoyed all the attention we got. The epic rose day and a star studded DJ night, it was the first time I took part in paper dance. It still amuses me how Shreyans Sir pleaded all of us “please participate in paper dance” and how ruthlessly we shouted our hearts out in the funky rally. Meeting various people and getting another Tech-Dad, Suyash Sir, was another event for me. We never wanted that weekend to slip by but then the coming days had something more in store for us, both good and bad.

With the arrival of the end semesters, the wish to change branch and the illusion that our elders create was broken to pieces. Everybody tells us, “study till you get into a good college, then you don’t need to work so hard”. What a lie!! First of all coming a month late to college and giving a hurriedly sandwiched sessional examination, the endsem grades dropped like the value of rupee. Maybe it was only my experience and others scored well but then being a 9 pointer and socially offline was never my idea of college. So, post participating in almost everything, I scored a 6.79 SGPA in the first semester.

Like most VNITians the second semester brought a New Year resolution of getting a good pointer this time and I did succeed to some extent. The semester started with the much heard of Institute Gathering  because all we had heard of in the Department Gathering was “wait for Institute Gathering and then you will know where MME department stands in the college”. Seniors instructed me well in advance to enquire about preferences of the first years and prepare a list of the same. As another active meta-mate of mine, Mihir, would agree, deriving things out of people wasn’t easy. Despite various personal messages, Facebook posts and mails, I started receiving responses after 3 weeks. Then making a document of the same and arranging the trials of each event, began the greatest hurdle of inviting people to IG practice. Yes, INVITING. As orders, requests and pleadings never work trust me. As many people would tell you, day scholars are the most difficult people to get into the IG events. Well this year was no exception barring me and Shruti. Repeatedly facing seniors’ agony for people who refused to leave their homes and honor the sports ground with their visit, the IG mania had begun and unknowingly I was roped into 6 events. We had heard about the various slogans that departments made, the way they cheered, the funky rally and the meta dance! As people await the weather forecasts, we awaited the “theme of the day”. Though I never got the chance to dress up due to various events of mine, it was a spectacle to see people dress up as Daya from CID or ghosts in Halloween. As the IG was flagged off the adrenaline rush began. Playing badminton in a court surrounded by pseudo hooligans and department love driven maniacs made me giggle in times of tough games but what stood strong all through the IG rush was our Department Representative Rupesh sir. Never had I met a senior so supportive and caring. Every match of mine began with an “all the best beta” and ended with “congratulations! Party!”, from him. After winning every event that I participated in, except for tennis as I had picked up the racquet a day before the match, IG gave me the very important self-confidence and daring to try new things. Other than these materialistic advantages, IG helped me meet seniors who now not only support me in every aspect of life but also treat me like their very own kid. Poonam Mam, Priyank Sir, Aashish Sir, Akash Sir, Tushar Sir and of course Rupesh Sir are the people I can turn to always in the department. The real inferno that VNITians can create was symbolised by the prize distribution ceremony in the IG. Dancing atop chairs and screaming till you can talk no more, the last night was one I can never forget. The pride of coming third had surpassed all pleasures of life. We were now Meta by heart and soul.

Post the fantastic IG was CONSORTIUM 2013, a fest I was waiting so long for. It fanned my desire to be an entrepreneur and made me learn various things about that sphere. Giving me the opportunity to write blogs for CONSORTIUM, Abhirup Sir was a patient guide and imprinted in me the confidence to build my very own business plan which moved on to win the 3^rd place in Ascent, a B-Plan competition in CONSORTIUM 2013, thanks to my team mates Abrar, Anmol and Jenil.

The events in the even semester seemed never ending as AAROHI 2013 followed CONSORTIUM. As most people would assume, being a dayski, I should have been a major part of AAROHI. But the fear of another low SGPA semester made me quit my desire to join in.

Succeeding AAROHI came the Inter-NIT tournament in Nit Surat. Playing badminton in school was different but wearing the college T-shirt gave me a different honour of being a VNITian. Being insecure about the trip, the first hour in the train was uneventful and lonely, but what followed was incessant fun and laughter. The volleyball team and badminton team were like doting parents with Aditi Mam and Pooja Mam playing my mother at times and friend at the other. Nobody of us wanted to return from Surat, a life of pure fun, be it the 1am cheering on football ground, funny motivating slogans or mall yatra at 10pm. Winning a badminton match is inevitable when you have Aditi Mam playing by your side anyways and hence VNIT secured the first position in Women’s Team Event.

If Surat wasn’t satisfying enough, the Physical Education Department awarded me with the Best Class Representative for the 1^st year due to support of people who did not let me quit in times of distress.

The final year farewell brought in the sudden realisation that one day we would be leaving VNIT and the emptiness that it would cause would be too hard to repair. Yes, I will be making the most of these 3 years to last a lifetime, but one can never have enough of VNIT, never have enough of its aura and never have enough of its love.

With Surat being the last milestone in the first year, this year brought too many things in my life.  Best of friends Aditi, Maharshi, Niket, Rushika, Mukunda, Pratiksha and a group of 15 pseudo maniacs along with loveliest of brothers Omkar, Ravi and Abhishek, most patient guides Priyank Sir, Keshav Sir, Viplav Sir, Abhirup Sir the list goes on and on and I can name people from everywhere.

VNIT in the first year itself has secured the position of first love in my life and has contributed in ways nothing has ever. I look back and laugh at the situation of my first week where I was lost in 216 acres of forested land and 1000 unknown faces transformed to my second home. VNIT will always stay close even after 4 years. I would never want to leave this place. Never.

VNIT

“Things will change in college”, they said.

“You will meet new people”, they said.

But they never said one could have fun tending to infinity.

Moving from a CBSE school to a college, anxiety reined my thoughts. My fears came true when the first week at VNIT fed me with indifference and non-cooperation movement. But then the roller coaster was destined to meet its zenith.

As I celebrate my first birthday at college and last teen birthday, I want to thank so many people I met in college for all that they have given to me through the year. Going in order which I met people here’s a small token for you guys. As it consists of many people and small messages for them, I will be tagging people in order of their appearance in the video. Though I strongly plead all of you to please go through the whole thing at least once and please please give me your word on this!

A big apology to Aishwarya Hoizal and Apurva Sharan, due to certain problems I could not put up your photos and I am really really really sorry for that. But there are no second thoughts that you guys are really important!

Starting with the compering team in Freshers- from the one boy one girl rule to all the rigorous practices we had, compering team friends still remain the closest! You were right Srijana mam! J

Aditi- I really don’t know how hellish VNIT would have been without you. Though I hate you a lot for inhumanely waking me up every time you are at my place, yet I love you loads!! You know I can write pages after pages for you but this isn’t the right place you see! :P

Niket- Can’t put up “our” word over here! :P For all I know, I really value a lot as a friend and you are one of my closest people in VNIT! Hope we strengthen the bond in times to come!

Sanskar- babaaaaa!!! Being with you is awesome fun as I can’t stop laughing! Hope to have a great time in this year’s freshers and hope to go on more baddy trips in the next 3 years! J  

Aeishwarya - a sweet girl with a golden heart! Pure innocence and pure fun! Hope to giggle incessantly with you in next 3 years!

Aditya ‘Sing’hania- All of us fail to understand your extreme passion towards singing! Although your jokes were never a pleasure, your singing makes us suicidal! :P Jokes apart, a cool friend you are. Hope to have more fun times with you!

Varada- a simple girl with great ideas! It is always good to be with you! I adore you for your simplicity and individuality!

Abhishek- My first tech-brother and the naughtiest one too! The mischief spark in your eyes is quite visible and getting random crazy ideas from you is never a surprise. Yet in you I got a great friend!

My first tech-family (first because there are many parents to come :P)

Rahul Sir- It was great to be a part of compering team, mostly because of you all! Thanks!

Viplav Sir- I have absolutely no idea from where do you derive so much of patience to answer each of my questions, irrespective of how dumb they might be, with calm and ease. Never ever have I seen you without a smile, and I have known that one person who could derive fun out of any adversity is you. You have always been there and hence I vow to keep troubling you all the time because you are one of the best grandads! :P

Srijana Mam- Sorry from all of us for being late every day for practice :P I know many people wonder why we guys have so much of regard for you. It is because you actually never let us feel as freshers. Mingled with us, had fun and all I have seen of you is you are always smiling! Thankyou for so many things (you know what I mean! :P)

Compering seniors-

Nisheet sir- always soft spoken and polite, you have some treats due :P

Apeksha Mam- I was actually scared of you in the beginning :P but then I saw the other side of you and really like you now J

Sharva Mam- thanks for giving me the opportunity to give the introduction speech. It means a lot to me J

Tech-Dads- Suyash sir, Devanshu Sir

Tech-Moms- Prithvi mam, Poonam Mam, Apurwa Mam

Tech-Grandad- Shreyans Sir, Niteesh Sir

As all my meta-mates would agree, Institute Gathering was the best time of the year for us!

Rupesh sir- you were seriously a very understanding and supportive DR! I won all matches because of your “all the best beta!” ;) IG was enjoyable majorly because of you!

Saurabh sir- Seldom do I find somebody so down to earth and polite. Met you in the intramurals and since then found a great friend in you! I cannot imagine you ever being rude to me. Thank you so much for being a confidant! J

CONSORTIUM 2013- A learning experience

Abhirup sir- Always guiding me through things, learning is fun with you! Hope to learn some more in your last year in college!

B plan team- Anmol, Abrar and Jenil- it was great working with all of you! Hope to take our plan to further competitions and win some great prizes ;)

CULT NIGHT- the first cult night was amazing for me, all thanks to our performance ;)

INTER-NIT 2013- NIT SURAT

The first ever trip with college mates, it started on a low note but later it was the best trip till date. Nobody of us wanted to come back from there. Be it the 1am football ground cheering or “khelenge jee jaan se” slogans, everything was just too good.  And the epic mall yatra at 10pm with the trophy :P

Life without some of you would have been really bad. Friends are the choco-chips in the cookie of life and they gave me a chocolate overload!! <3 :*

Aditi- again? :P There are loads of things I wanna say to you, but saying this completes them- just be by my side always!  No matter how bad I get, I would always love you a lot. No matter what somebody would tell me, I would always trust you the most! Chal bohot senti hogaya. Panipuri time :P :* <3

Maharshi- what to say about you MARS :P waving past all my insecurities about you, we turned to be the best of friends. Hope yours or mine anger does not ruin this someday….. If at all it does, we can kick each other and get back on track right? :P its effortless to have fun with you and Aditi. Hope to hear more of your crazy galaxy stories :D

Friends are people who know the song in your heart, and sing it back to you when you have forgotten the lines. For this god gave me two pretty people

Rushika- I know we have not known each other closely for long, yet sometimes you know the first time you speak to somebody. Hope to be a closer friend to you! Love you for your simplicity and straight forwardness. Just want to let you know that whatever I say to you is always heartfelt. Love you a lottt rush! :* <3

Niket- nikeeeeee! The most masti khor friend of mine:P you are the first person I knew in compering team and have been the closest hence.  Hope to have more fun together in the next 3 years! Umm…….aa…  :P :D

God dint make us siblings, because he knew no mother could handle us together :P

From being the most senti people to being crazy maniacs, we do it all and know it all. Every outing is enjoyable and fun. In you all I got every type of person, a singer, a dancer, a comp.sci.psycho, a mom, a best friend etc etc etc …. so on and so forth!

The three musketeers- From gravely serious issues to fun stuff, we enjoy it all! Making a deadly combination, really love you guys a lot!! Thanks for so many things Niket and Maharshi!!

Pratiksha- met you in the auditions in freshers but got to know you closely recently. A girl who smiles her heart out and dances from the soul. A sweet friend and simple girl, love you for your innocence. Keep your love for simplicity and Indian-ness alive, then I have a supporter :P

Prachi- a fun loving person and really extrovert! We always have fun!!

Brothers

Omkar- the sweetest and best brother that I could ever get is you. You are the closest to me in college and have always been there for me. I hope my situations do not make you suffer in the college this year :P a very very innocent and docile person, I admire how you never let your new priorities affect your relations. I could trust you with anything. Love you from the heart omi!

Ravi-  the “mai dabangg hu” brother of mine. You were the one who taught me the first lesson of college :P did not let me quit and that’s how I got an award at the end :D thanks!

Guiding stars in college-

Priyank sir- intimidating at first, but a great guide at the end, you have taught me various essential things. Love to be you great granddaughter! J

Akash sir- ever ready to solve all my doubts with a smile. Thank you  J

Keshav sir- sometimes I feel, you have been pre destined to pull my leg all the time :P despite your mischievous smile and humor, you have always made me smile out of the saddest of things, thank you so much J

Aditi mam- from being a tough mum to a lovely mischief accomplice, you have played all roles since I know you from school time. It is always fun to be around you and an honor to share the court with you. You are a great badminton player, many have told you that, but you are a fantabulous senior! Love you!

Friends-

Meta mates- baheti, prathmesh, alwira, mihir hope to have great fun this year! Yo meta \m/

Rajat sir- you already know what we all want to say to you! The most cooperative senior who never undermines you saying tu junior hai! We all will miss you a lot! J

Tejasi- the GOD! Down to earth and simple you have always been since school. Hope you shower a little of your pointer getting skills on us too :D

Apurva and shivani  the surat trip was awesome fun al lthanks to you guys! J

Mukunda- I am amazed how you can be so calm always! Nothing in the world seems to get you angry. The most ready to help and a “close friend in process” guy. There is lots to learn from you. J

Saujanya- sujiiiiiii!! Love you for all the fun we had in the first year! Thanks for mixing up with me so well!!  <3 :*

Abhijeet sir- I remember our plan :P it is great fun to be with you! J

Aniruddha sir- a very happy birthday to you too!  You are that one person in college whom I call up on my birthday, wish you “happy birthday” and get a “thank you same to you in return” :P

Credits-

Keeping up with my silly incessant doubts all through without questions- mukunda and apurva sharan

Constant supporters throughout- aditi, rushika, omkar, niket  and maharshi

Please do give me your feedback all of you J

P.S. There are loads of other people I value in VNIT, this is for all of you. Also the Chikni Chameli music piece is especially for Pratiksha! <3

         Regards

Palak

FREEDOM V/S SECURITY

IS MORAL POLICING JUSTIFIED?

                                  Recently a 15 year old girl was shot in the head for performing an IMMORAL  act that is attending school. Malala Yousufyai, a resident of Taliban occupied valley. The crux behind the matter ?  FORCED moral policing.

              So what actually is moral policing? EDUCATING a child about the right and wrong by the experienced people.

NO

                           “Forefathers’ teachings” is the veil for curbing somebody’s individualism and making him submissive to your self-righteous and dominating intentions and this is subtly named as “moral policing” today. That is an imposition of your or your forefathers’ experiences to the present generation. Then the question arises is do the same conditions and environment persist as they were with you or your forefathers? The answer obviously is a resounding NO.  We very well acknowledge the fact that we determine something called instantaneous acceleration or instantaneous velocity because we understand that at every moment the same set of conditions do not apply in space and time. Then why do we not accept this in the real world?

                        Moral policing in the past was displayed by the now extensively criticized acts of the Brahmins and pundits or the higher classes, wherein they decided everything for the whole community. It was them who decided what everybody would eat, how they would pray so on and so forth. That was done in the name of helping the individuals to gain ‘NIRVANA’ and hence people continued to accept everything that fell out of their mouths. But it has been irrevocably proved by historians that the sole aim behind this moral policing was their urge to keep the reins of the society in their hands, stay in control of the community and exercise immense power. Is moral policing justified?

                    

                    Today this “hidaayat” has taken various forms of either daily sermons by elders at home or more rigid forms of anger at certain acts of yours. Isn’t this done for your benefit? Protecting you from problems of society and safeguarding you? Have we forgotten the story of the little boy who nursed a butterfly’s egg for a quite a lot amount of time. Then one day he sees that the little one wants to come out and see the glory of the sun but is hindered by the egg shell, the boy in his attempt to HELP and SAFEGUARD it from the pain of the shell cuts open the shell so that it can come out. The consequence? The little butterfly can never ever fly because the very necessary initial pain caused by the shell was necessary for it to enable its wings for later flights. As the boy rescued the butterfly from that pain, he crippled it for life.

                

                  So what are we aiming for via moral policing? We are aiming to give our kids a golden spoon in mouth, fur coat on the shoulder and velvety roses under their feet for life? But if somebody is given a chance to live, he has got his fair chance of experimenting, striving, falling and rising up again in all glory. How many of us know about SWAT- Special Weapons and Tactics forces who use specialized tactics in high risk operations that fall outside of the abilities of regular uniformed police? They have a policy. They employ only those people who have seen at least one major failure in life and risen from it. Will a protected child befit that? NO, because he was never given a chance to experiment. Unfair and unjustified.

                

                                  I would like to conclude by stating the fact that if something as brainless as litmus indicator doesn’t show the same color in every environment so your educated self believes that a moral could in general apply to all irrespective of his conditions?

All I would like to say is LIVE AND LET LIVE and you would be amazed when people come and ask you to guide them J

WOMENHOOD

DISCLAIMER:-    This article does not aim to attack a particular gender or belittle anybody. Any resemblance to any person living or dead is purely coincidental and unintentional. It attacks only the male chauvinists. If it annoys you in any way then there is a slight possibility that you are a male chauvinist deep down inside. This topic was given as a debate in college and hence has quite an attacking approach! Moreover the recent “event” in Delhi provoked me to post this.

“There should be reservation for women in India”

Marianne Williamson says and I quote- “when a woman rises up in glory, her energy is magnetic and sense of possibility contagious”

I, an independent, self reliant woman of the 21^st century, stand here “without reservation” to inherently oppose the motion.

From childhood we all have heard the famous saying- “Educate a man, you educate an individual; educate a woman, you educate a whole generation.”

I would like to literally tickle the dozing, dominant, male chauvinists and bring to their kind notice that women today, are in no way subservient to men, neither are they dependent on your modest donation of reservations.

It is the 21^st century where a woman has been the President of your country, where Sunita Williams and Kalpana Chawla have walked the moon, wake up oh inferiority struck male society, the era of womanhood has begun. 

                 Gone are the days when the future of women was dependent on the whims of males, when women walked in half meter long “ghunghat”; today’s women rule companies walk in Armani jackets and are much more capable than men and hence need no reservation.

              Well groomed, well educated and fully capable of protecting herself, women no longer need to be restrained in meaningless shackles of society. The women today are in no way backward that they need crutches of reservation to rise to glory. They are as equipped and as capable as men to rise and excel.

Hence addition of another reservation is not a good idea at all! J

P.S. we shouldn’t be preaching women to be safe. Rather make the society a better and safer place to live in. And for all males dont be the man who stares at some improperly dressed but rather be THE MAN who offers them a jacket to put on!

                                     R.I.P. Delhi. This killed you. 

college days!!

AM I READY?

         Amongst all the euphoria for college and all the rhapsodies that all my dear friends keep mumbling unendingly, I personally come back to one nagging question time and again- Am I ready? Ready to go to college? Ready for the freedom from school rules that we all have heard of from time immemorial? Ready for the madness of choosing a different dress to wear to college everyday and not the same well ironed school tunic? Ready for canteen interfering our urges to attend a lecture (esp. for we bhavanites who have not had an in campus canteen ever! )

                   I think it is a cocktail of mixed feelings- that of anxiety and fear, freedom and inferiority complex of being lost in a crowd, amazement and disappointments, surprises and setbacks.

                             The jump from a school to a college is quite huge. People who have attended college after 10^th itself have already passed that stage but many of the others like me have our own personalized and customized apprehensions of the doorstep we are going to walk into pretty soon. No rules about your dressing, neither you have to tie up pigtails every morning (ugh! How I hated that at school!), un granted yet snatched freedom of not attending a lecture, and the most importantly lost in a huge huge crowd of people like you and still fight for your identity. No everyday national anthem and prayers and no assemblies!

                               My mind has often grazed on the idea that unknowingly how safe we had been in school. A fixed timetable, a fixed dress, a restricted campus and a closely known and personally attached staff. But here in college, as I have heard, you have to run to your professor and dig out help from him unlike at school when your teacher, instead, used to compel you and make sure you study and do well. Will we be able to handle the change? Well, I guess, time will tell.

                                   From a set of rules at school to a free bird in college another point of concern is our academic performance. I agree all of us have done extremely well at school, but did we notice that it was a place where we were bound to do well? We were given a proper guidance and environment to study but here, at college, the saying I hear from every single person is-college is self study. Will we, then, be able to stay up to the mark taking into consideration the varied types of distractions available?

There are mixed feelings that drain me now and then. Those of excitement and fear. Excitement stems from the desire to see a brand new world and an opportunity to create a new identity for ourselves, leaving behind the good and the bad we saw at school. At the same time, fear, particularly for me, stems from the anxiety whether the new world that I will see soon would be good or bad.

                                        People from all walks of life have raised one seemingly frightening question at me- “why have you refused to leave Nagpur when you have been getting colleges like LSR Delhi and Christ Bangalore??” to all of them, I have just one answer-such a large leap in life would be constipating for me! And I would be unable to digest that. You may call it my comfort zone of staying in Nagpur, or my indifference to gain a new experience of staying alone but honestly, I am least interested in such “experiences”. I can, in no way, trade awful loneliness and even worse food facilities with so-called freedom that one gets on staying alone. I think, personally, my comfort zone is where I would like to stick to. And about the “exposure” that people quote you get only outside, to all of them-the college remains with you only for 4 years but your life is what is more important. Opportunities have to be grabbed not spoon fed and life is finally what YOU make of it and not your college professor.

                           Whatever might be the attractions in college life the things I am really really going to  miss about my school is-the fight for being the class monitor, the race that we had as to who finishes copying the stuff written on the blackboard first and then keeps on shouting mam rub the board!! , who induces something different in the same uniform in order to stand out of the class, who manages to purposefully come late to the class and manages to stand out (outstanding students!) and also who takes the quickest first supplement in tests and who takes the maximum, the sweet comparison of marks and taking each others’ answer sheets to ask for an explanation “why the hell have I not been given marks and he has for the same answer!”, the anxiety of what I have got for recess today to the fight over tasty food, distributing sweets on birthdays and so much more. The fight for the first bench in elementary school which now will change to the fight for the last bench! The awesome time at recess when we would either play in the corridor or rather dutifully spread our napkins and eat our tiffins together or trying to hide your tiffin fron that big foodie because of whom you return home empty stomach! The planning of asking baseless questions to teacher to waste a class or making small anonymous noises to distract the teacher, stuffing food in our mouths when the teacher faced the blackboard or purposely putting our heads down and acting asleep or our very own chalk fight. Today I am hit by strong gusty waves of nostalgia!

                           Anyways, it depends on person to person and remains a debatable topic throughout. But  one thing is common and sure, all of us, each one of us has those little butterflies in our tummies while imagining the first day of college and at the same time the remembrances from school keep hitting us on and off! So to all my friends-have a great college life and stay safe! Also, don’t forget your school friends because

“When you make new friends,

Don’t forget the old.

Because if new is silver,

Old is GOLD!” J

 Have a happy college!!

P.S. – I am already getting sleepless nights!! The excitement is onnn!! J

HAPPY BIRThday!!

     “The obsession about birthdays stems from the intense fear of an individual that his or her existence might not matter to anyone else”

Ram Gopal Varma speaks and I quote.

                  Birthdays have always been special for every human being despite the age, gender, religion, caste and nationality barriers. Along with differences in rituals there are varied differences in celebrating a birthday too. Be it the 75^th or the 1^st birthday the pomp and show of a birthday has gained newer heights. As i step into my adulthood with this birthday, I was obsessed with writing about everybody's favourite day of the year.

                              As a kid, I distinctly remember literally counting days to my birthday even weeks before the day. The intense planning would follow like making some interesting games at school or planning the dress I would wear on MY day! But really nothing could beat the anxiety of the gifts that were to come in the evening and the dishes that my grandma would cook for all my friends. And of course the painful birthday bombs. Why do you hit the person on a happy day? Friends do get mean and drop you from a height that time.

                         The attraction of a birthday has been made by our own culture. In earlier times grand pujas and distribution of food and clothing would mark the birthday of an upper caste individual whereas a day off from work was the only birthday gift affordable by the so-called lower castes. As time moved forward and globalization and influence of western culture entered every sphere and strata of India, the culture of special birthday gifts, birthday dresses and birthday cakes made way into every birthday party. There were times people would scowl and comment “haw! she doesn’t have a birthday cake in her party! She might be poor!” Depending on the caste there are different rituals and ways of celebrating a birthday. On one side where Maharashtrians do a small arti of the birthday boy, Punjabis groove to high volume DJ and south Indians celebrate 2 birthdays. Whatever might be the way, all cultures have instilled in us the fact that birthdays are YOUR days. The day when YOU are the STAR of the day. Some schools have the policy of allowing the child to wear any civil dress on his/her birthday.

Birthday parties have transformed a great deal too. From small parties at home with home-cooked food, the parties have gradually shifted to movie treats or meals in restaurants, not forgetting the lounges. Is the change for good or bad? I do not know. Depends on the host, the guest and the place.

                                             If you are the type of a person who doesn’t get excited at such occasions, not to worry, each of us has one that type of friend who will call you in middle of the day and scream “abeeeee tera birthday aaraha pagal, kuch excitement hai ya nahi.” For me Purva Kale does that deed! J love you batty! <3

                          Be it your first birthday when your parents throw a great party for you, of which you remember nothing! Or your thirteenth birthday when you step into your teens and every one tells you about how you are at a new threshold in your life. I don’t know why is the sweet sixteen birthday so special but still, it is. Or be it your eighteenth birthday, when you are constitutionally an adult, irrespective of whether your elders consider you one or not! Or may be the twenty first for some. It’s the official drinking age.

Intense planning goes on for that day and from 12 midnight your phone refuses to keep quiet and your facebook wall is the most visited that day. People who you haven’t spoken to for years will suddenly come out of the mist and shower blessings and greetings on you and you suddenly feel so important.

             Some people take birthdays as an excuse to ask your parents for anything you want, after all its YOUR birthday, they cannot scold you. Can they?

                                Yes, birthdays do have a special importance and you do not want anything to go wrong that day, not even a strand out of place. Be it the 1re. chocolates you have to distribute at school or the shape of the cake you want to cut that evening, from the special return gifts at the party or the outfit you finally decided on to put on that evening. Or may be the way your friends turn malnourished and keep pestering you for a party.

                    Even as I step into a responsible adult, a part of me wants to be that careless, effortless kid. For me birthday is THE day I wait for the whole year through. Beginning from midnight calls, going through a small party with friends, one with the family and a visit to the temple, the only thing I hate is when my calendar shows 12^th july. Birthday over! Darn! Back to the normal life. Its amazing how I love the strike of 12 at 11^th july and how I hate the same on 12^th. But then there is that hope of a better birthday to look forward to. And it is my friends who make it a great day! Thankyou guys!

Hoping for a great 18^th birthday tomorrow!! 

P.S.- I will never forget the small birthday treats at checkers or joshi vada pav after tiring tuitions @all yukti people! J

The unknown story

THE UNKNOWN STORY

These are the lines that guide me throughout. I personally think that I need these lines not during defeat or failure but particularly during a success. These are my guiding words, neither a spirit nor an angel, this is what guides me all the way.

 If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream—and not make dreams your master;
If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same:
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss:
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much:
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!

What maketh a man? A question still unanswered! If there was a single solid formula to success then CHATUR would have been the most successful person but alas! With the DNA the formulas for success also change from person to person.

In today’s times I think its more difficult to hold your head during a success than during a downfall because in these times of expectations the more you do the less it is and the more you are expected of! Alexander Graham Bell quotes- “a man, as a general rule, owes very little to what he is born with-a man is what he makes himself”

My class 12 started as normal as anyone of us but I had no idea where it was aimed at. Never did I think of ranks and competition but a day changed my perspective. One of my respected teachers had challenged me that I could never get more marks than a particular student. That was the day my eyes gleamed with a dream, a dream to do what I could but had not till now, maybe it was my personal *pop* of the popcorn theory. I knew I would not aim at topping a mere unit test but something bigger than expected by anyone.

 I really don’t know how I did it but at the end that mattered was that I could do it and I believe it was never a one man show. Everyone had a role in it and by that I do not mean only the ones in my support, my well wishers, my friends, my parents…. I think, quite differently, that every that person who has even once thought ill of me without any flaw of mine and every that person who has, voluntarily or involuntarily, been jealous of me has accelerated me much more towards my aim. Yes, they are those people, for e.g. who have liked my writing but felt it against their ego to like it… this is just one of a kind.

There has been no SECRET SUCCESS MANTRA for me and if there has been I have no idea about it! Because many people are quoting their self made talks as my words but personally I don’t think there is any mantra. There’s just 1 thing I kept in mind always. I have loads to prove to many people, all those people who never trusted me, never gave me a chance, or rather thought I have been given too many chances already and din’t deserve more- to all of them I had to say “abhi toh bas udaan bhari hai saara akaash abhi baaki hai”

Interestingly, very less people know this, but there is a big big disadvantage to all this glory, all these achievements. People know you even before you have spoken to them or even known their names. Yes, it is a drawback because then they formulate a fixed idea about you that yeh toh aisi hee hai. Living example Srishti Roy. I love you babes but I think you should have fixed your idea about me after speaking to me. There are still many whose ideas I cannot go and change individually by personal interaction,to all those- I am not as people tell you, experience for yourself think for yourself. Another drawback is I am ear marked and tagged that she keeps studying. Who the hell will trust me if I tell them that a night before mathematics prelims I was at the DJ till 1am at my sister’s wedding. Yes, but I am a purely no-nonsense type.

So…. Leaving all that behind to all I would say is I am not what people told you, I am what I am. Know me and test me by your senses.

If anybody has ever noticed, if a 60 percenter says that look I will top this year hes marked as an OPTIMIST and sadly if a 90 percenter says the same thing he is marked as PROUD and ARROGANT. If a normal student chooses to keep quiet due to some reasons he is named as introvert and at the same time if a topper chooses to stay quiet ufff its his misbehavior. Cool na? na… not so cool. Many people no more think of you as living human beings, you are either made expectation fulfilling machines or emotionless competitors. And most of the times words are mumbled in self-respect, not in arrogance and then I am responsible for what I say, not for what people understand.

             As I step out of school into a new college life, I just wanted to clear the stuff with all of you. And if you all still refuse to believe in this so, respectfully, it doesn’t matter. All I can do is hope… hope that we could bond better, hope you could know me better. You will truly regret it one day! J

And to my near and dear ones-thanks for staying by me through thick and thin I really love you all…. And I bet you will never get a friend like me.

        Truly yours

Palak Marwah

SENSE AND SENSIBILITY

To protest the central government's decision to import milk powder and other dairy products, some activists spilled thousands of liters of milk on the Satara-Pune highway.
The activists stopped a milk tanker on the highway and spilled the milk all over the road. The import of dairy products will hurt the interests of the local dairy farmers, they claimed. 
In a similar protest a week ago, other activists had stopped five tankers and wasted over 50,000 liters of milk in Satara claiming that the organization had decided to take the step as milk prices would reduce by Rs 5 per liter following the Centre's decision to import 30,000 tonnes of milk powder.

                        This is the scenario in India where 47% of the children exhibit a degree of malnutrition. 2.1 million Indian children die before reaching the age of 5 every year – four every minute – mostly from preventable illnesses like malnutrition, diarrhea, fever etc. If a protest had to be staged it could have been done in a more sensible manner. The protest could have been carried out by hijacking milk tankers and redistributing milk free of cost among poor people in that area. Surprisingly in a country whit revolution had to be launched in order to raise milk production to meet the demands of the growing population, there itself a whooping 50,000 litres of milk was drained out on the streets! Shocking but true! Its all the matter of sense and sensibility.

                        Was there really no way to sort out the differences with the government peacefully? I guess probably we Indians, belonging to a country of Gandhi have taken the Gandhian ideal of  Satyagraha far too seriously yet misinterpreted the process way too much. The activists projected the aim of their protest as guarding the interests of local dairy farmers who would be financially crippled due to import of milk powder but in the way they forgot that those 50,000 liters of milk must also have been the output of some other farmers’ hardwork which they ruthlessly wasted which could have filled the empty growling stomachs of many rather than washing the streets!

                            This is not a single instance of (non)sense. Rich farmers in Delhi and western U.P. poured milk in a drain in New Delhi on 21^st April 2012 in a protest against the decision of milk products producing companies to reduce the purchase price of milk by 37%. No words!

                                    The wastage story doesn’t end here. There’s more to it. In India about % of the population that is about million people sleep empty stomach every day. At the same time the other side of the coin is this- As on August 1, 2010, the total food stocks with the FCI were 55 million tonnes (mt) as compared to the buffer requirements of 27 mt. Of this, 15 mt of wheat was lying in the open in Punjab and Haryana alone. As per estimates, 50,000 tonnes of food stocks have already deteriorated beyond human consumption as a result of long, improper storage. Reason? Black marketing, illegal stocking and hoarding of grains and then reselling the hoarded grains, obtained at a low price from the government under the PDS, in the open market when the price increases due to low availability of grains. No doubt the government has implemented many schemes for the welfare of the poor but there is no proper implementation at any level. From the grass root level of villages to big cities the poor barely obtain any advantage out of it and die of malnutrition and hunger. have farmers toiled so hard to feed their grains to rodents and rats? Apart from loss of grains how can we neglect the loss of resources gone into producing that amount of grain? The people in the BPL have been there for years and years and still there seems to be no scope of their upliftment. On both sides we Indians are at loss. People in Orissa  and other poor states die of hunger and at the same time rich farmers in Punjab and Haryana face losses due to over production.

Hence at this point, with no dearth of facilities, the only thing India needs is implementation of policies and schemes because we can surely not ignore the current situation.